You Alone Are My Strength, My Shield

Here I am again, sick at home. This is the third time that I’ve been sick since school started and it knocked me down for quite a while each time. I was knocked down the longest this time. I guess I’m just getting whatever the littles bring to school. My immune system seems to not be working well!

I have learned an important lesson through all of this: I’m too busy. I rarely rest. During the week we are gone all day (commuting, sports, all day at school, etc), then I get home and we make dinner then bedtime routine. On the weekends we have been in town almost every day (it’s over an hour away). We were home all day on Sunday for the first time in quite a while. Ethan’s sports has also been too much to bear. He was in two at one time and I’m already feeling burned out. And so is he. We have already told him he is not allowed to do two sports at the same time anymore. My body is tired which is why I’ve been getting sick (and why I’m exhausted all the time). I have felt behind on everything. The house has been a mess and we’re so behind on laundry. We’ve been eating things that are quick and convenient despite having all kinds of healthy food. I miss my camp family. I haven’t been spending time with them at all. I’m irritable because I’m stressed and worn out. This doesn’t align with my values as a person, mother, wife, teacher, and friend. I want to be calm, peaceful, light-hearted, and intentional.

I’m thankful for a pause (though I wish it was under different circumstances) because it has given me time to reflect on who I want to be and how to make it happen. I guess God knows what he’s doing.

This morning I woke up at 3am. I decided to get up and have alone time with Jesus. It was a beautiful time. I needed it.

I’m going through the book Fighting Words by Ellie Holcomb. It’s a devotional around memorizing scripture. I’m terrible at memorizing anything, but I’m making effort. I made a couple of graphics with the scripture and have one as my lock screen on my phone.

Steffany Gretzinger is one of my favorite worship artists. She came out with a new song which is actually an older song that I love. It represents where I am spiritually right now.

“As The Deer”- written by Martin J. Nystrom

LYRICS:
As the deer panteth for the water
So my soul longeth after Thee
You alone are my heart’s desire
And I long to worship Thee

You alone are my strength, my shield
To You alone may my spirit yield
You alone are my heart’s desire
And I long to worship Thee

You’re my friend and You are my brother
Even though You are a King
I love You more than any other
So much more than anything

You alone are my strength, my shield
To You alone may my spirit yield
You alone are my heart’s desire
And I long to worship Thee

You alone are my strength, my shield
To You alone may my spirit yield
You alone are my heart’s desire
And I long to worship Thee
You alone are my heart’s desire
And I long to worship Thee

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